Welcome to my Blog.

These are my ramblings in an attempt try and understand my Dissociative Identity Disorder. Thank you for reading my blog and I hope that together we can come to a better understanding of the human mind. If you have any questions or comments you are more than welcome to add them to my blog, or to email me. I would love to hear from you.

15 July, 2013


One of the hardest things we go though is to see some one we care about in pain. It is hard to hear them cry and know there is little you can do than offer a shoulder for their tears. Being multiple doesn't change that. We are involved, every day, with those who have seen the worst of people in this world. To presume it is over and in their past is naive. This pain and trauma is with them every day they draw breathe. They are, brave, strong and resilient, and will hide their tears behind the most genuine of smiles. When you see them smile and get on with their day, do not presume all is well. Do not presume they are over the pain. They mask it well, their survival has depended on it. But be warned, be sure you are ready for the answer before you ask for the truth. The truth is not painted in pretty colours, there are no rainbows or unicorns. The truth is the ugliness we all try to hide. It is that which we don't want to even think about. It is the skeletons in our closets we want no one to see. It is the darkest thoughts in the middle of the night that we hope God cant even hear. It is all of that and more. Before you open the cupboard be sure you really want to see its contents. It may be harder than you think to take and once you have seen it, you will never be the same.
The truth is our enemy, it holds us hostage for years against our will. "Never tell, we must never tell."
"No one will believe you if you told anyway." " Very bad things happen to those who tell, and you don't want that do you?"
The truth is also our greatest ally. Once it is out and we have the weight lifted from our shoulders, we can learn to breathe again.
With truth can come fear, guilt, humility and freedom. Once you have accepted it, you can never go back.

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