It has been interesting to see how Mr 19 has been dealing with my DID. He moved out of home to live with his father, at the exact time I was diagnosed. This is his first time living with a known multiple and he is having trouble getting his head around the condition. He will frequently say...Why cant you just....? Like, Why cant you just accept you are in an adult body and be adult? Why cant you just make yourself focus on work and just go back to work?
It has taken quite a bit of patience and understanding to work through these thoughts and comments of his. He had no idea of the severity of the trauma we have been through, and he was pretty much guessing we were just making most if it up or over acting. I have given him some brief information about what we went through, in the hope he will start to see the seriousness of the situation. He doesn't realise that much of what he says is actually quite hurtful. He thinks that we should just take control of the obviously disruptive rabble inside and get on with life. I have had to explain that I am not the boss inside and that I am not the one to order the others around. We work as a team. If he has to do a group task at work with 20 other people, he cannot just order them to do as he wants. They must work together to get the job done. Just about every decision we make in our lives is done as a group. And if you make the 'wrong' decision there are plenty more inside who will let you know about it and possibly decide to kick you out of any further decision making.
I am hoping he will, in time, gain a more educated understanding of DID and its workings. But it is going to take time.