Tomorrow is my dad's operation day. So I haven't heard any more about how he is going as yet. Last week I did have quite a chat to my Psychologist about it all. One of the points she brought up was about how everyone inside would cope if he died. Many of us have said our goodbyes already and don't feel too worried about what happens if he doesn't make it. But of course it is never that simple, especially for a multiple.
There are others of us inside (mostly younger ones) who were very close to him, and still think of him as 'our daddy'. For them it is not going to be as easy. We have decided as a group to start helping the more attached ones to mourn his loss.
Obviously because he lives interstate we are used to not seeing or hearing from him regularly. Some of us have comes to terms with the fact it is now permanent but others haven't. It is always a tricky thing finding a solution that will work for everyone, but this is what we came up with.
We have taken our memorandum of safety and a picture of Dad, and put them on the back of our bedroom door. We don't have any pictures of him up anywhere else in the house so this
the only reminder of him around. Every so often we read through the memorandum and look at the picture, in the hope that it will slowly get through to everyone inside what is happening. We are expecting there will be a time of grief and mourning. If not from all of us, at least from some. It has been on the door now for just over a week, and no obvious affect to far, but we will wait and see.
As I have said before, I wish him no harm, and all the best for his surgery and recovery, just not in a relationship with me. I will keep you updated.