Welcome to my Blog.

These are my ramblings in an attempt try and understand my Dissociative Identity Disorder. Thank you for reading my blog and I hope that together we can come to a better understanding of the human mind. If you have any questions or comments you are more than welcome to add them to my blog, or to email me. I would love to hear from you.

30 January, 2013

Sleep, why have you forsaken me?

The last week has been tough going. We have had a LOT of trouble sleeping. So far I have managed to get to 4am with no sleep. grrrr.
I think it started about a week ago when one of my dear friends came over for a visit, and we sat up talking till 3am. Something tells me that gave my teens the idea that we could do this all the time. I haven't been able to sleep well since then. Its not that I am not tired, I am exhausted. I will be so desperate for sleep that I am forcing my self to stay up past dinner time so I don't sleep to early. By 9.30pm I head to bed thinking this will be easy....I lie there for a while breathing deeply and waiting for sleep to take me. It does not! Instead my sewing alter comes up with some awesome ideas for quilts she wants to make and how to do it. It is a little easier if I get up and write them down but I cant always be bothered. Eventually my body will give way to sleep....ahhh sleep, until suddenly I am thrust awake by at least one of my alters saying "I don't want to sleep". Yes that is right they wake me up about 2 seconds after I dose off. NO matter how many times I dose off again, they will wake me up. They want to get up and watch TV or do something outside. I was up one night cutting out the fabric for my son's dressing gown at 2am because I refused to just lie there and wrestling with myself.
Today is my son's first day beck at school for the new year, so I had to be up early to drop him off. That meant I had to get some sleep so I could drive. I was determined last night to sleep in my bed, and not get up. It took me quite a while and I was very restless but eventually I got there sleeping with my head at the foot end of the bed. Now to get through today with out having a nap so I am hopefully so tired tonight that no on can argue with me.

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