I have had a bit of a hard time today getting over the affects of the anesthetic. I have suffered with fatigue and feeling rather vague. I haven't had much to do today so that has made it easier. I find at this time it is always hard to tell if it is the anesthetic or the dissociation that is causing me to be a bit vague. I have been feeling like I am not connected to the world and that I am living in my own world distant from others. Yes this is what I would guess to be a normal response to being sedated but it can also be dissociation. It is very hard to know what is what. What I have been through the last few days would definitely cause dissociation but so would anesthetic.
Tonight at dinner time I tried to break through to see if it really was dissociation. I could barely taste the food I was eating and I had no idea if I was getting full or not. I felt like I just wanted to go back to my room and sleep. I persisted and pushed through to a stage where I now have energy and feel much more alert. It is one of those joys of being a dissociative is not being quite sure weather you are still slightly drugged or just off in your dissociation.
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