Welcome to my Blog.

These are my ramblings in an attempt try and understand my Dissociative Identity Disorder. Thank you for reading my blog and I hope that together we can come to a better understanding of the human mind. If you have any questions or comments you are more than welcome to add them to my blog, or to email me. I would love to hear from you.

25 March, 2016

Can You See Me.

All my life,  I remember whenever we went out to a show or play or even to the shops, we would be looking at the people around us.  Or even the people in the show,  begging, pleading with them with our eyes to please please notice us.  Please see us in the crowd. Please somehow see us and know that we are special and save us from the life we live.  Please please notice us and know that something is wrong and do something to help us.  We still do it today as adults and still no one ever does. 
When they don't notice as they never do,  we leave feeling we are invisible and not important, and that 'they' are right and we have no value. Otherwise someone would have noticed the girl/woman in the 5 row dying inside.
 But i guess we can't be seem.  


  1. We could only seek a savior in our imagination. When we lie in bed we're thinking of a person on telly or maybe even of the real life and imagine that this person sees what happened, sees how bad we're suffering and saves us. At least we get a feeling of not being left alone for a short time...
    One thing I'm wondering: How much of this girl/woman who is dying inside are you actually showing? And how much are you hiding? That people didn't notice was life saving in the past, I guess, so probably a strong mechanism, trying to seem normal.... So again, are the people allowed to see you?

  2. Thanks for your comment.
    I don't know how much they see now. We try to be open with who we are and when we are having a bad day, but I think people don't really want to see or know the truth.I guess inside we still feel like we are dying and no one can see.