System Safety

System safety is paramount. A system is the name we often use to refer to all the Alters together. The protection of the internal functioning and all the alters is the most important thing. To many Multiples, the need and desire to maintian a functioning as a cohesive whole image is one of the highest priorities. We MUST  look normal. For us we try to look as age appropriate as possible, within some boundaries. We do not like our little ones out in public. We try our best to make every situation as normal as possible, and we watch people constantly to see how they behave in situations, so we have a clue as to how we should be behaving at that time.
 We had a very hard day a few days ago and stress levels were very high. As the internal distress increased to almost the point of panic, one of us stepped in to calm us all down. It was very affective and certainly made getting through the day a lot easier. In order to do this the pain, emotion and even some of the memory about the incident must be taken deep inside and hidden from view. It works for what it is intended, as it does calm us down, but the emotions and memories are not gone, just buried. It means I /we can function better and that we often don't remember all the abuse and trauma, but it  isn't healed either.
The next day we were exhausted, totally worn out. We had to spend the day relaxing and not doing much to get some energy back. We are not back to full strength today either. It has taken me a while to connect these together. When we are going through a very stressful time it drains us of so much, that it can take a couple of days to recover. The stress experienced in the body must be immense. I would hate to see my blood pressure during those times.