Being Human

I don't know if anyone else has the same problem as me, but I forget to just be human. I spend so much of my time thinking about my Disorder, reading about it and Dealing with the trauma that I forget I am a human being just like everyone else and I need to have fun times too.

I haven't done many social things for a while because I really haven't felt up to dealing with others without bursting into tears. Last night I had a group of friends around for a fun evening of home shopping. I haven't laughed that much in a long time. It was a wonderful opportunity to catch up with some old friends and enjoy good times.
For several hours, my voices stopped, my mind was clear and I was enjoying the fun and jokes of the evening. For several hours I was not a broken discarded person fighting her way through recovery, but a normal woman having fun with friends. It was wonderful. I had forgotten how much I enjoy it.
I guess in all of this I am trying to learn that my disorder doesn't define me. It affects me, but it is not all of me. I need to laugh and forget just like everyone else. 

Yes I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, yes I am recovering from trauma, but I am also a fun vibrant woman who loves to laugh with some amazing friends. I just need to remember........... to live!!