One hellish step closer to freedom!

Haven't been posting much lately as my other blog has had so much more of our attention. It has been hard to water life down so we can write it on hear. So much has been severe flashbacks of things we aren't even sure of HOW to write about. Its been 5 days since things hit the fan for mothers day. At 15 we were raped and became pregnant. We were not permitted to keep the baby and were forced to have an abortion. The insider that went through this, was mourning terribly the night before mothers day. It was not easy and she wanted so much to be able to have and hold your little angel. But she had no choice, there was no way she would be allowed to keep it. It was his and he held ALL the cards. They took it out by force and killed it there in front of her. Then mothers day hit with programs that were used on us and because we don't have our mother in our life now, we couldn't/wouldn't  follow through with them. 5 Days later we are slowly coming out of flashbacks, memories, exhaustion and anxiety. We have had to see our Therapist about getting some sedatives and sleeping tablets as it has been just too hard to go on.( we have never used sedatives before, but we were just that desperate) We have had trouble breathing, standing, focusing, and our body shook. In all of this, we have learnt about two special people inside and what they went through because of this programming and the evil sick minds that raised us. We will never be free but at least we will be one step closer the freedom.