'Things have been getting better with my immediate family lately. Things were starting to settle down. I was beginning to feel relaxed, I was even starting to get my sense of smell back. ( My sense of smell is the first thing to go when I am stressed and or dissociated).
Then today hit. Like a tone of bricks. My son 'J' had been home sick for a few days. I didn't think much of it and only took him to the doctors today to just make sure it wasn't anything major. After leaving the doctors surgery I got a phone call from my ex husband, J's dad. J was in trouble again. It has not been an easy few years with him. He had lulled me into a false sense of calm and trust. I was just beginning to trust him again after the last incident which had involved the police.
They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger....quite honestly, how much stronger can I get. I sat with my Psychologist the other day we listed of the things I have been facing over the last few years. She said she often sees patients with one or even two of these things to deal with, but never this many. I am not sure if I should be pleased or cry. Her is a short list of some of them.
Dissociative Identity disorder
Post Traumatic stress disorder
High blood pressure (not really surprising given the list)
( and few relatively minor physical health issues)
Hubby - degenerative kidney disease
Low muscle tone
Child in trouble with police
Children skipping school
Step family ( that one is just a tricky little bundle)
This is not including, my own divorce, my parents divorce, my father disappearing during my teens, and of course the abuse I endured as a child.
There are probably a few other incidentals I have forgotten for now, but I am sure we can now safely say.... it is time for a break. A full year without any thing nasty would be nice. I have learnt not to hold my breathe waiting for that. I am sure there are others out there who have suffered far worse than me... but this is my little whinge! Done!
P.S. J turns 14 tomorrow. Happy birthday my son!